Few days ago, i went to my supervisor's house for some makan-makan preparation. I had some deep conversation with Dr's daughter named Syuhada. We had actually, Najwa and me. She told us lots of stories including those lovey-dovey stories which she is having at school.
School days. School moments.
How much i miss those really.
Stories begin when she asked, Kak Najwa ada boyfriend?
Then leads to all the experiences from me, Najwa, her and what-not.
What i try to emphasize here is, the way she thinks is almost equal to what i had in the old days. How much tiniest things like shirt color during raya, the caring-ness of a guy when approaching a girl, the text messaging, eye contact in class, almost everything really make me reminisced. Till, instead of i should respond nice and better to her, i came to the condition of just giving her long-minutes-of-smiling face.
I still remember each time when i met my cousins, we would spend hours talking about boyfriends. I was a great listener i guess cause sometimes they were like berebut to tell me their stories. or maybe i was just full of myself. haha But, i was very considerate before, i can be very detail in recognizing relationship's problems and provide the brighter side of each worse event in relationship. Where did all the capabilities in me disappeared to? Because now i can think nothing except how much guys are too good to be true (Zarina, 2014).
When my rationality hits me back, i ended up telling her how i felt about 'love' now, which i think, it is not a good way to catch a girl's mind especially girls at her age. I knew i wouldn't like the way i sound if i still at her age or mind. But, yeah. My thoughts slip. Words cannot be undone.
But i really hope one day she gets what i mean.
P/s: My thoughts were actually same as what i said in previous entry. And i should convey the right message to her, such as.. You can have those experiences, be with someone but make sure, he is worth it as he can lead you to a better you each day. Of course, do not rely on him too much that you can barely breathe if he leaves. Because why? This kind of love rarely lasts forever. Channel you strength, your mind AND attention to other better things/people.